Driving at Night

By L.B. Lewis

L.B. Lewis

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Photo by urtimud.89

I don’t know about you but I don’t really like to drive at night. I’m doing this write-in and that was the prompt they gave us.

What am I saying?

I don’t even drive these days. I’m doing LA on my terms.

I have a free parking spot with nothing there. I prefer to walk but I don’t like to walk at night. I was thinking I would buy a white vest or jacket so people would be able to see me.

Then I would be like a ghost, and people would know me as the ghost walker of LA. They would see me and I’d be famous. But I wouldn’t ghost anyone.

Almost everyone that I see driving in LA has their phone nearby while driving. Your phone can wait. No matter how many brain cells you have, make at least one brain cell do the thinking and stop texting while driving.

Once I saw a girl and she was texting at a stop light. As I was crossing the street, I stared at her — texting. She looked up and I shook my head, like an old woman. I am becoming an old woman.

What am I saying?

I was born an old woman. But I don’t look like an old woman. For the first time in my life, I got 25 year olds hitting on me. And, it’s not because of my big…bank accounts that is for sure.

What am I saying?

I should have asked if THEY had big…bank accounts because of all these nepo babies running around with more money than they can count…I mean more money than I can count.

So, yeah, from this day forward, I will no longer miss my chance to be an ex-broke, now-pampered cougar in LA.

But I know who I can always count on. In these crazy times, it helps to know that you can always count on Starbucks. It used to be that you knew your neighbors. And my neighbor is literally Starbucks.

When my real neighbor ghosted me, well not really, because I can still see them and say hi to them, I knew it was just how LA was. But then when I go to Starbucks, people can’t ghost me because I have the app and at my Starbucks, everyone is very nice.

What am I saying?

I pay them to be nice and I keep track with the app.

At least that’s working.

But, I don’t care what anyone says: You can do LA however you want. Just make sure you know what you’re saying.

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L.B. Lewis

Author of SMALL TALK WITH MYSELF, a 2022 Official Selection of Catalyst Festival and #1 Amazon book. Views are my own. Founder: MonteCristoStudio.com.